Is it possible to find love during one of the most uncertain times?
Let’s take a look at dating pre-pandemic...
You aimlessly scrolled through the latest dating app and swiped left on the ones you were attracted to at first glance. If you happened to match, you would start a conversation that would eventually lead to a meetup. Or at least that was the intention for most. You met them for a coffee, a meal, or a drink and just played it out as the date went on. You would decide whether you wanted to take the time to get to know them even more. If you are a female, you would likely wait to hear from him first and waited. You would be caught in this agony for a couple of days wondering if ‘he liked you’ to move on with your life. If you heard from him right away and felt the same way, you would carry on the conversation on a daily and schedule other dates together. If it didn’t go well, you would either ghost each other or politely tell them that you didn’t feel a vibe and move on with your life.
Let’s think about this… you decide if you like them based on their photos - then decide if you want to continue based on that first meeting. You know nothing about them, you have not had the time to even connect on a more emotional level and you write them off based on a short time conversation.
Okay, I get that sometimes you know instantly if it will work out. I realize that. But if you are looking for something serious, long-term and, a committed relationship - shouldn’t you invest more?
Now let's look at dating during a pandemic.
It starts the same, you are aimlessly swiping (because well, you have nothing else to do), you swipe left on the ones that catch your eye, your message back and forth but now you are caught in this weird space of how do you get to know each other more without meeting? Everyone is being more careful and cautious, told to stay home and stay within our household circle. So how does one date?
I started to think about this over the last couple of weeks and after a conversation with my fiancé about it (because we met pre-pandemic but dated like we were in one) and here’s what I learned - maybe the pandemic taught us how to date and how to build a long last relationship.
We have the technology and we have the time so why not use both the best we can. We have the opportunity to video chat, so why not have online dates to grow the relationship and start communicating? You are on your phone anyway, so why not start using it with a purpose?
I'm encouraging you to start talking on the phone. If he says he's not a phone person - bro, if you like her, you’ll talk to her on the phone.
I'm also encouraging you to schedule video dates. If he says he doesn’t do video chatting - ladies, this is the same type of guy who sends dick pics. Dude, get on video and talk to your girl. Saying you're not a phone person’ is complete horse shit. That's a cop-out because you aren’t used to it. Get used to it because none of us are used to being in a pandemic yet here we are.
You can build and grow a relationship without being together every day. If you take the energy to invest the time into making it happen, it will happen. Put in the same effort you would if you were actually out on a physical date. Get to know one another on an emotional level then you can decide if you’d like to take it to the next level and meet in person at some point.
People are approaching dating more cautiously these days because of Covid-19 but shouldn’t we have been doing this all along? Take the time to invest in the person you are pursuing. You can build a beautiful relationship and connection without needing to meet them in person on the first day. Dating isn’t dead because we’re in a pandemic, we just need to pivot differently. Yes, it's uncomfortable, but do it anyway.
You've done more uncomfortable things in your life and got through it just fine.
I encourage you to date during the pandemic and watch what magical things can happen!
Sending you good vibes & love,